Bunco

In addition to the child-bearing capabilities (and a few other things which will remain unmentioned) I am comfortable in saying that there are many differences between men and women. But, perhaps I am being to general in my beliefs. Allow me to be specific with a brief discussion on the social aspect.

When I get together with some of my friends we will most likely meet somewhere, or maybe sit in front of a TV to watch a game or a movie (switching between the two during commercials and boring parts. We might even throw in a third show). There are guys who get together on a regular basis to play cards. A comfortable number would be about five or six men. Any more than that and things start getting wrecked.

My wife, Rhonda, meets with some of her friends once a month for a game called bunco. It started innocently enough, as these things often do, with an invitation to join a group of women to play a game at someone’s house. One of the regulars was absent so Rhonda was brought in as a substitute. She had so much fun she decided to get some friends together to play at our house one night.

There didn’t seem to be any reason to be concerned. She was just having a few friends over, some food would be included – hopefully enough for me to eat after the guests became distracted with the game. I could watch TV, maybe do a little reading in the comfort of my own home while a few women played quietly in the next room. I was thinking Scrabble or bridge.

Either I hadn’t asked enough questions, or I had tuned out the explanation station when it was broadcast. This is a game where a non-participant feels like the one person in the room who didn’t get the joke. Everyone else is having fun, you just can’t understand why.

Not everyone has heard of bunco. While not excluding men from playing, bunco is more popular with women. As a reluctant observer, I would describe the game as somewhere between Yatzee and all-star wrestling. Almost as if it were part of the game there is a great deal of loud laughter, some hollering and even some aggressive physical activity.

As I understand it - and I don’t really want to understand it - you need about 12 participants to make a good bunco game. Sixteen or even 20 players is an acceptable number. With numbers like that, any sane man would want to be anywhere else.

I have tried to stay upstairs in my bedroom and endure the mayhem. But the noise level becomes unbearable. Even my headphones don’t dim the din.

I try to have my truck out of the yard and on the road a good 15 minutes before the crowd gets there. On these nights I will go and walk around the malls, maybe go to a quiet sports bar and watch whatever is playing on one of the 42 TVs. I may sit in a bookstore or coffee shop. Any destination is suitable as an alternative to being home on bunco night.

But, as the night wears on, places start closing shop and I get tired – so I head home. I pull into the driveway (when there is room) and try to negotiate my way into the garage. Then, resisting the temptation to lean a ladder against the house, I walk through the door and decline invitations to join the game.

As a man there are some things I am not wired to do.